I shared this post a year ago. I am repeating it today because I need to be reminded again.
Once upon a time my life was consumed by fear. It started as a young girl and seemed to disappear for awhile. But then as a newlywed, it returned even more debilitating than before. I could not stay home alone. I could not go out alone.
Dw and I were living in a home that backed up to a major highway. Literally, from our upstairs window we could see the hardware store’s front door behind our home. We were remodeling our home and Dw would often say he needed to run to the hardware store to pick up something. The second he would say that my intestines would kick into gear and I would have to run to the bathroom. I could not stand the thought of him even going to the hardware store and leaving me home alone. I was so afraid something was going to happen. Here I was, 20 years old and afraid of everything. I hated it. I just could not seem to conquer fear.
Dw and I prayed alot about it. We memorized vast amounts of scripture together. We talked to our pastor. There was still no real breakthrough. At times like that friends, I don’t know why it is that we seemed to be doing all the right things, but still there was no breakthrough. Sometimes I think that the Lord is waiting for the right time, the right place and the right people. Scripture says His ways are not our ways and all I can say is that I have certainly seen that to be true in my own life.
Like I said, I had had this same intense fear as a young girl, it had dissipated and now had come back even worse than before. One Spring day our church women’s ministry went to an all day women’s retreat at a ministry center in downtown Buffalo. I had never heard of the speaker but Dw was supposed to be away at a planning meeting and I figured I would go with the ladies (cause, quite honestly, I sure as heck was not going to stay home alone).
The lady speaker had kind of an annoying voice. (Sorry, just have to say it, cause really, you just never can predict who God is going to use, ya’ know?) After her morning sessions we all ate lunch. I thought about leaving and heading home. Between her voice and the sessions being kind of boring I thought it was time to head out. But I was so afraid to be home alone and I knew that Dw wouldn’t be there for about 4 hours so I decided to just stay. It’s so interesting to me that inspite of all my youthful pride and arrogance, God was about to work hugely and grant me one of my biggest emotional healings through someone that I found kind of annoying.
After lunch she said that she was going to show us how to have our personal Bible study and one way to hear God speak. She told us all to turn to Galatians 5 and start reading. As we started reading, the moment we read something that kind of jumped out at us we were stop and just know that that was the Lord speaking to us.
The very first verse was this:
“It was for freedom that Christ set you free,
therefore, keep standing firm and
do not be subject again to this yoke of slavery.”
Galatians 5:1
The moment I read that my heart jumped! God was speaking directly to me! Right at that second I knew the Lord was telling me, “Linny, I sent Christ to set you free from these chains, but it is your job to stand firm.” I could have stood up and screamed!! That was it!! He had come to set me free, but I was choosing to keep myself in these chains. The enemy had tied the chains around me, the Lord was the key and I had to take that key and unlock the chains. I would never be free until I decided to step out and be free. Period.
It might sound over-simplified to everyone reading this, but really, it was a life-changing verse. God had sent His son to set me free, but I was choosing to keep the chains of fear wrapped around my entire mind and soul. Right then and there I asked the Lord to forgive me for doing this. I told Him I wanted to get this right. I was done being a slave to fear. I was done with fear. Right then and there, in downtown Buffalo at the Buffalo Christian Center I broke those chains. I left them on the ground of that big building.
The conference happened to end early. My ride and I walked to her car. I knew Dw would not be at home for probably an hour. What would I do? Would I get dropped off at a friend’s home for him to pick me up later? NO WAY! I had cut those chains and was leaving them all behind and I was not picking them up again.
I asked my friend to drop me off at home. I went inside and got busy thanking the Lord for setting me free. About an hour later when Dw walked in the door, he looked at me with a puzzled look and asked, “Are you here alone? That was a tiny beginning, but a beginning – none-the less!! Over the next days, weeks, and months I continued to stay home alone for bits and pieces of times. Before long, I loved being home alone so much I didn’t want to go out! Yes, indeed He had set me free!!
Friends, this story is a story of victory over emotional torment and pain. And sweet friends, with as many as stop by our Place Called Simplicity, I know that many of you have struggled with fear as well. And fear comes in all sizes and packages, like: fear of being alone, fear of flying, our kids dying, our spouse dying, natural disasters, snakes, spiders, bugs, water, heights, putting on weight, fear of being yourself, cancer, disease, economic pressures, fear of failure, fear of a spouse cheating, fear of marriage, fear of marrying the wrong person, even fear of success, fear of mission trips, fear of adopting, fear of crowds, change, fear of intimacy, growing old, needles, praying in front of others, ministry opportunities, fear of friendships, job loss, job change, job relocation, just to name a few…..
There is absolutely NO DOUBT that our Miracle-working, Mountain-moving, Awe-inspiring, Gasp-giving God wants to see you set free as well. The enemy of our souls comes to steal, kill and destroy our lives; held captive by fear and worry.
I have never done this before, but I would like to offer a simple prayer for all who,
like me, have struggled with fear.
Lord, you are faithful. Your word is the same, yesterday, today and forever. You have come to set the captives free. Your word is full of promises. I know there are bloggy friends who have struggled with fear and Jesus, you came to set them free. I pray that they would surrender their fear(s) to you, knowing that in doing so, the chains are broken. (Galatians 5:1) I ask that they would have the courage to repattern their thoughts and lives, taking every fearful thought captive, standing on the promises of your word, taking courageous steps of action in combating the fear, surrendering their thoughts to you – knowing that “You will keep us in perfect peace when our heart and mind is stayed on you.” (Isaiah 26:3) Thank you Lord, this day give my friends the courage to be set free from fear.
A little chain in our Memorial Box represents the chains that were broken that day
in the spring of 1980 in Buffalo, NY.
If you are new to Memorial Box Monday, it is explained here. Every one has stories of where God ministered to you through protection, provision, healing, etc….please share them and post a permalink below…I can’t wait to read them all {and with my big kids and Dw headed to Africa, I have time at night to read each and every one.}
Haha! I had never been afraid of being alone in my own house before; until today, a few hours ago when I cut off part of my pinky finger nail while chopping up a REALLY HARD squash. It didn't really hurt, but the thought of something worse happening to me was frightful! I think I read your post at exactly the right time! Thanks!!
SOooooo many fears and soooo many chains!!! Thank you so much for that prayer…I too need and want to be FREE!
Thank you for sharing. This post was helpful to me. Glory to God!
Some years ago I was at a ladies retreat in Denver and the speaker had us go to Galations 5 and listen to what God was saying to us. I can't remember her name but I wonder — it must have been the same speaker. God spoke to me that day as well, and it taught me to go to His Word ready and eager to hear what He has to say.
You said you needed to be reminded of this again…me too! This story helped me before and the family crisis we are in recently that has made us feel unsafe and me afraid…..well, I think God just graced me again with your story…along with a sermon I heard Sunday about living by faith not living by fear. Don't you just love it when God wraps us up in His love and gives us just what we need!
Keeping you in prayer Linny especially with part of your family gone.
OH my gosh Linny…your post couldn't have been timed more perfectly. I have had the chains of fear wrapped so tight around my heart and they are destroying me. Since my seperation, and even in the months leading up to it, I too am scared to be alone and turn to my friend far too many times instead of God, scared to eat and battling hard with anorexia right now, scared I'm not good enough, scared that I will never be of any use to God, scared that I must be doing something so horribly wrong or I wouldn't feel like this, scared to trust, scared to surrender, scared to love even my children for fear of being hurt…so many fears are consuming my life and I just can't seem to make the right choice or that I don't even know what the right choice is…and to be honest scared that He is going to tire of my 'drama' and leave me all alone…I am so tired of hurting
Hello sweet friend that I met at the Antique store-
My sis and I were together for Christmas and we talking of the fear that we were raised in. (mom would pile all 5 of us kids in her bedroom and shut the door, push the bed over the door way, have a knife under the pillow and a gun by the bed) God has brought us out of so much fear and yet we realize there are still areas that need broken.
Thank you for your post Today-
bee blessed
mary
Thank you, Linny, for posting this. I needed scripture to grasp onto right now as I was living in fear today. I'm in my mid twenties and am jobless, despite having a degree from a great college, and I can't seem to find work.
My parents had been helping me financially but told me today that they will soon be stopping "the faucet" and I will have to support myself. This will be my first experience supporting myself and I'm very fearful because I've never done it before and don't have a job to make ends meet right now, despite my efforts to land one (other than babysitting and childcare at my church). I'm volunteering in the field I want to be in but jobs are few and far between. But I know I'm where the Lord wants me to be and that I'm doing what he created me to do.
Please keep me in your prayers and thank you for your encouragement and allowing the Lord to work through you.
Hi Linny,
I don't have a blog to link to,but I wanted to share this story from Christmas. My son and his new bride planned to spend Christmas Eve (in Kentucky) with our family and then travel that evening to Illinois to spend Christmas with her family. All week I had watched the forecast which showed ice and snow moving into our area. I watched the forecast in Illinois as well; I asked my son and new daughter if they were keeping in touch with her family to find out what the weather was doing there. We discussed that they might want to head out before it got dark. (My son isn't the best driver in good weather….) But, they waited and hung around with us until dark. I prayed as they headed out, but worried none the less.
As we headed home (an hour in the opposite direction) the phone rang. My husband answered and the car slowed to almost a stop as he listened. Shane and Olivia were in white out conditions and had gotten stuck on the side of the road. We were too far away to help and they were still a few hours from their destination. We lost cell signal and there was no answer when we called back. We heard back a few minutes later. Someone had stopped to help pull them out. About an hour later Shane called to update. Their "good samaritins" helped them get back on to the road and offered them a place to stay for the night since the roads had gotten so bad. He went on to share that when they got to their home Shane walked in to see one of his former classmates at Kentucky Christian University… several hours away, in another state. God is so good. I am thankful that He covers my children when I can't.
Have a blessed day! Thanks for your willingness to invest in the lives of so many others.
Laura
what an excellent reminder. I guess chains come in all sizes.