Linny, I totally get the pressure a mother feels to do things exactly right, especially when one has kids with special needs or kids that have dealt with a lot of deprivation in their early years. Sometimes I feel like I need to be perfect to make up for my children's very difficult beginnings. I have one child who has to eat gluten free and one who can't have dairy. My kids have been both overweight and underweight when we adopted them. You have obviously done a fabulous job fattening Miss Ruby up and that was just what she needed. I read what you feed her for breakfast and it is fabulous! My kids eat oatmeal with almond milk for breakfast most mornings. The nutritionist obviously didn't know what a wonderful mother you are if she had any concern about Ruby. All your kids look the picture of good health. All you have to do is cut back a little bit on the things you were adding in to help Ruby gain weight. Healthy weight is a balancing act for everyone including kids with special needs and at times they are going to go over or under the recommended weight. The most important thing is not the exact numbers but a balance over time and what foods the child is being fed. A slightly underweight or overweight child will not have a problem if they are eating a healthy diet. I have also gotten lectures on good nutrition from a dentist who treated my child who had many severe cavities in China from getting candy for four years with no teeth brushing. He was a very kind dentist and was so used to giving out the healthy diet spiel that I just listened even though I had told him before he started his spiel that I had a degree in nutrition and wasn't giving my kids soda or other sugary drinks. I think you get an A+++ for Ruby!