Oh dear friends….words fail me as I attempt to convey what treasured gifts all your cards, flowers and gifts have truly been to my soul.
Probably no surprise, but I am a written-word girl. I love cards, stationary, pretty pens, journals and, of course, I love expressing myself through words. Once upon a time, when Abi and Tyler were little and Dw would give me a few hours off, my most favorite thing to do was go to the drugstore around the corner and stand in the card aisle for hours. Seriously. (Anyone else love doing that?) The feelings expressed through the words written often encourage, comfort, care, and often bring healing.
Yes friends, I have savored every one of the cards you wrote….dripping tears at the beautiful words contained in each. Grateful from the bottom of my grieving heart for loving me so tenderly. Many of you who wrote I’ve never even met, yet you gently acknowledged my grief and tangibly loved me in this time of painful loss. Just knowing you care and took the time to write a precious card, my eyes well with tears – thank you. And to those who handmade cards – wow! Their beauty truly a work of art.
Truthfully, I’m still working through trying to grasp my inability to not only go to be with my mom, but the inability to bring her to our home to live out the rest of her life has been hardest of all to grasp. She wanted to come so bad! In fact her last real sentence to me was, “If you are coming, come as fast as you can, just get me out of here.”
Everywhere I turn and every little thing that happens reminds me that I need to call her and tell her….only to remember, again, that she is no longer a call away. Walking in our little “library” where she slept when she was visiting last time freezes my thoughts. She should be here right now.
For those who sent a memorial gift to The Gem in my mom’s honor – thank you, thank you, thank you. I am still praying about how it will be used exactly because I want it to be a lasting legacy to the selfless life my mom lived. You who never met her, you would have loved her. Everyone did. I have an idea for the Memorial which Emma, Josh and Dw love but we will have to see if it will work. I will keep you posted on that.
I have spent time talking with old friends from my growing up days. My friends loved my mom and many called her “mom”. I have loved hearing their memories of her…treasuring every single morsel….just to hear them speak of her so fondly ministers to my soul. I have talked with my cousins and my mom’s closest friends…oh how I have treasured the time hearing their stories and how much they loved her. Each grieving this horrific loss. As the poem above says, “Speak their name…it’s music to my ears.” Thank you friends, thank you…for speaking her name, even if you never met her. You truly would have loved her. She loved others so generously and she would have loved you too.