So we’re home.

The flights were good.

At one point I was pushing Vernon one-handed who had his backpack full of books in his wheelchair while I precariously balanced his walker on one side of it, pulling with my other hand the loaded-with-documents-wheeling suitcase which had two duffel bags on top, and a diaper bag over my shoulder…I was scurrying as fast as I could.  Liberty was really sick and was carrying Pearl while wearing her own loaded backpack.  I started to laugh.  If only my soon-to-be 40 year reunion-schoolmates would have been able to see me.

I laughed heartily as I turned over my shoulder and called to Liberty, “I could be home empty-nesting right now and heading for a pedicure!”  It really was funny.  Quite a sight, I’m sure!

There were two more mad airport dashes each only to find that our flight was delayed!!  Hey, I probably burned a good pile of calories on those!!

 

Thankful that the Lord was gracious and in spite of the hours and hours of delays He got us to Phoenix where Daddy, siblings and a crowd of friends were waiting.  What a beautiful sight!  Dw counted 62 people!!  

For the record, we have never, ever had a crowd gather.  Ev-er!  I have seen many others pictures of crowds welcoming friends home and longed for our own.  Finally, it was our turn.  Usually just Dw, the kids, my mom {when she lived nearby} and once a young couple who are sweet friends.

So this enormous crowd welcoming Vernon and Pearl was such soul food for us as well!!  Our Pastors Scott and Lydia even pulled their sons out of school, because they felt they  needed to see this monumental event!  Our church’s satellite campus pastor was in California at a conference and rearranged her schedule to come! Precious friends from the area showed up in force.  One friend, Melodie even brought cookies for everyone {even GF for me!}.   We have such wonderful friends to do life with here in Phoenix!

And somehow my friend, Rebecca {who lives in Florida} found a photographer who was willing to donate her services to snap shots of the joyous event!!  The pics that we’ve seen are so breathtaking!!  Another friend’s daughter, Amy, is visiting so she also being a photographer, took pics as well!

Rumor is that there were not many dry eyes as Dw prayed before we came, and as faces saw Vern and Pearl!!

Meeting his own daddy for the first time…

 

Our first picture together as a family – at the airport!!

So the big question on everyone’s mind:

How are we all doing?  I mean – really doing??

Well the good news is that everyone is thrilled that Vernon and Pearl are home!  Over-the-moon thrilled from the big guy to the once-baby-now-turned-big-sister.  

But can I just say:  Adoption is a delicately intricate dance.  Each relationship is worked at carefully, gently and gingerly as we anticipate and work towards bonding.   Sometimes the attachment comes quickly and easily and sometimes it is a much longer, intentional, even painfully deliberate process.

No amount of preparation can predict which will be the case, but there is a general rule:  Prepare for the worst, be grateful if it happens quickly – and always pray throughout the entire undertaking.

Probably not many would have imagined that Vern would be beginning to bond and our beautiful little jewel would have walls of steel safety built miles high around her broken little heart.   Seriously, so painful to watch.

So we dance.

Thankful always that prayer is our foundation, that the Lord is continuously at work and that He gives us wisdom each day.

Ever-so-slowly progress is made.  Something like one step forward a few backward.

One day we see bits of progress and we are just giddy and hopeful.

And then the next day rolls around and it’s two steps back.  Likely Pearl fears that if she would choose to love us we will also leave her as well??

She’s already known abandonment.  And we know of at least 10 different orphanages, hospitals and foster homes that she’s been in for extended times.  Ten!!  For sure already 10 in her short little 3.5 years.  That means adjusting to new caregivers 10 different times!  I mean seriously, Who in their right mind would want to do that again? 

So many emotions.  Yes, she’s little, but the reality is that she’s had so much grief and loss.  Sweet baby girl.

Truthfully, of our 14, not all have attached easily or quickly.  And maybe surprisingly to some, a few of the littler ones have had a much, much, much harder time than the older ones we brought home.

It’s a dance, for sure!  Sometimes a waltz, other times a slow dance and even some rock-n-roll.  sigh

I’m sure the big question on so many minds is this:  If it’s so darn hard, why in the world do you keep adopting?

First and foremost, God calls us to two simple things:  Love Him and love others just as much as we love ourselves.   We just don’t feel we’re really loving others if we pretend 163 million orphans don’t exist.  

Second:  All beautiful things in life take tons of intentional love and boatloads of hard work.  Case in point:  Marriage.  Haha.

Third – Kids are amazing, awesome, stupendously joyous fun!!

For the record, there is not one of our 14 that we would trade in – we love them each ever-so-fiercely – in spite of the good, the bad and sometimes the downright ugly!!!!  

So Pearly’s little broken heart needs not only physical healing, but tender emotional healing.  Sweet baby girl.  She’s such a jewel, please would you pray for her if you think of her?? And feel free to include Vernon in that.  Sometimes he misses China, his friends at the orphanage and the precious caregiver/nanny he had for many, many years.

It’s a dance.  Right now we’re mostly slow dancing with some intermittent rock-n-roll.

Love you each lots.  You guys really are the best!! xoxo