Did you ever come to a fork in the road and wonder which way to go? Perhaps it was actually a decision in your life which depending on which way you chose, it would potentially change the trajectory of your entire life. Things like a job change, a cross country move, a career choice.
Think about it, for those who met their love in college, what would have happened if you had picked a different college? These are questions that people all over the world have worked at trying to figure out over the course of their lives. What if this or what if that?
I know for our family, moving to pastor in Durango, brought us four of our kid’s spouses: Sarah, Karl, Savannah and Josh. Isn’t that crazy? We couldn’t imagine our lives without them! But what if we had not moved to Durango?
What’s even more crazy is when Dwight and I look back at our decision 36 years ago to pursue adoption. Yup, 36 years ago we were in the process of adopting from Korea when I found out I was pregnant with Abigail. We were stunned actually. I thought the doctor’s office was lying to me – ha! Anyway, back in those days you weren’t allowed to be pregnant and in the paper-process of adopting from Korea. Everyone had to sign a paper that if you got pregnant you would notify them – which we did and they halted our adoption process. Thankfully, we had not been chosen as a family yet for a little Korean treasure. Then when Abigail was a bit over a year we started the process again which brought us our precious baby boy Tyler.
Dw and I think, “We could have missed this if we had not chosen to gather and expand our family from all over the world.”
I shudder, personally, to think, we could have missed this girl on the left who makes us laugh daily with her joy, this daughter-in-love who is married to our oldest son (and first adoption) and this little loves-to-have-tea-parties-with-Mimi-girl. I mean, adoption has brought us this precious heap of beauty:
And this guy who smiles most of the day, who waited for 14 years for a mom and dad!?! We could have missed this guy. He is pretty funny – we are so grateful that we found a long time ago that #wheelchairsarentscary
What if we had chosen a different road? I can’t even begin to imagine. We would be missing out on ice cream cones on our back veranda with this pair of love bugs.
These three would likely have spent their life not knowing the comfort of family, the beauty of laughter with siblings and the necessary snuggles of a mommy and daddy. Medical needs would have largely been left untended to. I can’t even begin to grasp.
Liberty and I wouldn’t have had the giddy-thrill of driving to Colorado to surprise this one with the birth of her second – a boy named Sawyer! What would I have done that week-end this past March? Definitely nothing even close to as beautiful! Autumn you are such a sweet fragrance to my soul!
And visiting my mom this summer would have been a boring picture of just her and I, but instead, our big pile of treasures have given Grandma reason to celebrate (and reasons to take good care of herself so she’s around a long time!).
This is “butter cheeks”. Her cheeks are the softest-soft I’ve ever felt. Her personality is one of service and sweet kindness. I played with a little black doll my whole life – she was my only dolly. I tell Elizabeth she is my dolly-dream-come-true. We could have missed this girl. She came home with Elijah as #9 and #10. Wow. My heart would be so sad without them.
“Laid-back” doesn’t even begin to describe him. Chill, easy-going, never ruffled, impish grin, great sense of humor. What would we have done without him? We’d have been bored to tears for sure. And our morning Bible study? Almost every day, they crowd together and snuggle up and there are always giggles and “stop poking her/him” while we trying to settle down to read…but seriously, I can’t even begin to think how dull mornings would be without this heap of shenanigans on our couch? (And yes, Ruby’s signing she’s thirsty.)
It’s National Adoption Month and we stop to remember, “We could have missed this.”
Our lives would look completely different if we had not taken the plunge 34+ years ago. We would also never have been able to really comprehend the orphan crisis if we had not adopted way back when.
I know I’ve said it once before, but do you really think that we would have gone back for Johnny-boy and Birdie last year if adoption wasn’t a joy and a blessing? Trust me – not at our age! If we had found that adoption was a a giant stinky-bummer we would have said, “We’re good. Thanks, but no thanks.”
But instead we’re actually 100% convinced that adoption models God’s heart. We reached the conclusion many, many years ago that God’s best for our family was to lovingly gather treasures from around the world. Even though money was scarce (okay, so we actually didn’t have any!), family health issues were real, our home was small, we were very busy, we already kids, and the list goes on…
But we look back without regrets….and praise the God of the universe, because we could have missed this!
PS Maybe you have been thinking about adoption.
Have questions: APlaceCalledSimplicity@yahoo.com Subject: Adoption