He’s NOT a Deadbeat Dad {Part 3 }

When I began this series, I felt strongly from the Lord that I was to remind anyone who would listen that God is NOT a deadbeat dad and that He will provide for each of His treasures to be brought into their forever family.

He wants every.single.orphan in a family.  Yes, you read that right.  Every.single.one.

So if you are teetering on the fence of “how can we ever afford to bring our first one home, or in the process of adding another one {or more} to your ever-expanding pile of treasures”…listen up – His plan is for every.single.orphan to have a home and He uses ordinary people, like you and me, to do that.


So let’s figure out what the Lord would say to those wanting to adopt {but can’t figure out financially how to do it} or those in the midst of an adoption and wondering how it’s all going to financially come together?

The Lord spoke really clearly as I was preparing this post….but let’s start with an illustration….before I share what He said, cause His words might not make much sense without the illustration first…

Remember the illustration I used about Dw and I telling Emma and Graham we wanted them to load the kids in the car and take them to the park?

{If you haven’t read that post, it’s here.}

In the illustration I mentioned asking my big kids to take the little ones to the park.  Only thing is that the park is quite far away {too far to walk or ride bikes} and the gas tank is completely empty.  And there is not a gas station anywhere within reach.   So how would they get the kids to the park?

Well elaborating on that same illustration, can you imagine Graham and Emma saying to each other,  “Hmmm.  Mom said we have to take the little guys to the park, but the gas tank is empty and the gas station is far, far away.  Here’s what we’ll do…..”  
Graham on one hand heard about someone going door to door in the neighborhood when they had a need so he sets off to see if anyone has a little gas in a gas can that he can have to get him to the station. 
Only trouble is that not one person is home.  
Emma on the other hand heard about a person who raised a bunch of money through selling lemonade and thinks, “I know, we can set up a lemonade stand and sell it in front of the house, then we can call a cab and have the cab take us to the gas station and get gas.”

So Emma gets busy making lemonade even having the little guys help him {and they drink most of the lemonade before it even gets to the stand – haha} and together, with great hopes, they set up the stand and sit and wait for a car to come by.  Except when cars do come by, they don’t stop,  other than the mailman who takes pity on them and buys one cup.   

Each car that passes causes Emma fret and worry because they are not stopping, and down deep it would actually be easy to get pretty peeved at the lack of compassion with all these adorable little treasures call to them, wouldn’t it?  
And the entire day passes and all that’s tinkling in the cup is one shiny quarter.  
NOW…can you imagine what would have happened, if Graham and Emma had stopped and asked and waited for my answer?  “Mom, how do you want us to take the kids to the park?  You know the tank is empty.  Do you have a plan as to how we can do that?”  
Can you imagine if they had stopped,  asked and then waited for my answer?  Because Mom would have said, “Guys, yesterday Daddy went to the gas station and filled up the gas can and it’s sitting in the garage…pour it in the car and you’ll have enough to get to the gas station.  And here is $20.00 to put more gas in the car once you get to the station.  Then you will be able to drive the kids to the park.”  
I mean, think about it.
If it’s HIS will to bring treasures home, 
why would He not provide?

Seriously, why would He not?
Yet, how many times have we jumped ahead of God?

How often do we say, “Hey, I know what I’ll do for God!  I saw so-n-so do this as a fundraiser and they were successful so I will do this too.  Only thing is “this” doesn’t work for them.

How many times have we felt:  I can help God out here…I’ll do such-n-such to this thing movin’….

And someone else says, “I know what I’ll do, I read about a blogger who did “xyz” and it really worked for them – so I’m going to do “xyz” as well.  I can’t wait to get the results she got.”
But instead “this” was not what God had in mind, nor was “xyz”.   Yes, that’s how He did it for the other two, but He is as unique as the treasure each is bringing home, so His plans will be as unique as well.  
So here’s what the Lord would say:

Ask, {Perhaps even Fast.} and then Wait for my answer.

Now please don’t say, “Well Linny, that’s a no-brainer.”

Cause frankly, I have met dozens of orphan-lovin’ people who just jump on the band wagon of however someone else did it instead of asking Him… only to be brokenhearted, hurt, offended and downright peeved that their adoption fundraising idea didn’t work for them.  

I have also met an equal number of orphan-lovin’ folks who have asked God what He wants them to do and then instead of waiting for an answer, they jump right in and do what they wanted to do in the first place!    

Friends, He wants to whisper to you.  {Psalms 25:14}  Intimately.  Uniquely.  Quietly.  
He does have a plan that is tailored just for you and He will NOT leave one orphan behind that He has purposed for you to bring home.  He will not!  
And no matter His plan for you and your treasure –
the ultimate goal He has for you, is for you to learn to trust Him….

How does He whisper?  Can we really, truly hear Him speak?  
A couple of years ago I did a series on “How to Hear God Speak?”  
He is a God who never changes.  He longs to speak clearly to each of us.  
Asking and waiting is key.   
Let me make this really clear as well:  He doesn’t need our help to provide to bring a treasure.  He really doesn’t.  If He wants to, He can drop thousands of dollars on your doorstep in an instant, He is more than able.  That’s not usually how He does it, but if He wants to, He is able.

Why doesn’t HE do it by just dropping the money on our doorstep?  

We would not have any reason to talk to Him if He did that.
We would not have any reason to fast.
We would not have any reason to trust.
We would not have any reason to wait for His whispers.
Faith and trust are the key.  Remember this verse?

And without faith it is impossible to please God, 
because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists 
and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.   
Hebrews 11:6

He said it and He means it!  If we are to please Him, we must have faith in the first place that He’s going to do it.  In another passage He says that we only need faith the size of a mustard seed.   And I betcha almost everyone reading this has at least faith the size of a itsy-bitsy mustard seed, right?

I honestly believe that the whole idea behind faith is that in order to have faith {and trust} we have to get to know someone.  He wants relationship.  He always, always, always wants relationship.  

If He just dumped the money on our doorstep, we wouldn’t have to trust Him, would we?  We wouldn’t have to wait.   Adoption is a faith journey like none other.

Very recently Dw and I did something stupid. Really stupid.  Maybe, one day, I will share.  But the point is we didn’t {1} ask the Lord for direction and {2} hence, we didn’t wait for an answer {no, it has nothing to do with adoption in any way}.  Anyway, when we realized what we had done and yes, the situation is complicated with is not an easy fix {ugh} we immediately asked the Lord to forgive us and to show us what to do to make the situation right.  We then fasted.   No, what we did wasn’t sin in any way…it was just that we didn’t ask Him and  we didn’t wait for His answer.   We are both still extremely annoyed at ourselves, for learning this lesson {again! and the hard way} at our age.  ugh.  

And as far as fundraising for an adoption – there is a tendency today to “just hurry up and do it”…instead of patiently waiting for His answer on how to do it and what to do {hurry up and get a loan, re-finance our home or something else to “get ‘er done”, when in fact He had a different idea all along}.

God will use fundraisers.  He will.  He might use yard sales and bake sales and giveaways…the key is What does He want YOU to do?  

He is an extraordinary God….can we not imagine that He just might has an extraordinary idea tailored just for YOU? Perhaps even something that no one has ever heard of before.  Just sayin’ – He sure could!  

This is the formula:
Thank Him for the answer coming.
Trust Him while waiting for the answer.  
He WILL answer, in His timing. 
THEN Obey {Do What He says}  
And personally speaking, while I wait for Him to speak…I do often fast.
Fasting is a spiritual discipline that enables me to hear His voice more clearly.

So there’s the word from Him:  Ask Him how He wants you to pay for the adoption.  Then wait for the answer. He will answer and remember He might just answer in little steps…”do this first”…then “do that”…. 

Next – He’s NOT a Deadbeat Dad {Part 4} 

21 thoughts on “He’s NOT a Deadbeat Dad {Part 3 }

  1. I know there are many families out there currently fundraising for their adoptions. God led us to start a central website for fundraising families http://www.youradoptshop.org It is completely free for adoptive families to use and 100% of the money goes directly to the family. There is a short application to fill out that ensures that only adoptive families are selling items on the site. We currently have many families selling on the site and lots of fun things to buy! Right now, I really need help spreading the word. Your Adopt Shop also has a Facebook page so if you get a chance please "like" our page. Our prayer is that this blesses many families.

    Amy Patzer

  2. I know you are speakng about adopting here, but the formula you share~~ Ask, fast, etc. really can be applied like you mentioned to every single thing in our lives we are needing guidance for. This is great….Looking forward to part 4.

  3. Ahhh Linny… Beautiful… as I sit here with 2 of the kids down with the flu… The Lord has been speaking to my heart… a dream… a dream for our future… I am deep in prayer… Praying for Him to clearly show us His way for our future!!! The Lord is using you to speak His words to so many… Thanks for being a willing vessel! Prayers for you and your family… Have to tell you too… that EVERY.SINGLE.TIME. I look at pics from Autumns wedding I am overcome with the faithfulness of our miraculous God!!! :):)

    1. Me too! It is all so encouring since we are adopting number three (and have not a penny to pay for it (but we have payed for other things along the way))!

  4. Linny,
    I am loving these posts. My husband is reading them too. We live by faith in that my husband is self-employed. We have always loved that. Sometimes it is SO VERY hard not to get stressed and worried, but God has been so faithful to us. He is our Great Provider.
    A few years ago we had a mountain of debt to pay off. We really wanted to start the adoption process, but knew God would not honor that until the debt was cleared. It took us 22 months, but God showed up big time for us. In that 22 months we paid off about $120,000. It was a thrilling ride to say the least. Lots of hills and valleys, but God is so good. We are now close to bringing our 2 girls home from China and waiting on the Lord to show us how we are going to find an extra $26,000 in travel expenses:) We live solely on cash… NO DEBT. We are confident that He will show us the way.
    Funny that you say you have found yourself in a bit of a mess for lack of praying and waiting on the Lord. I too am so frustrated with a hasty/emotional decision I made a FEW YEARS back. Matt and I went to the opening family night at our former Christian homeschooling program. It was a moving night. We were so thankful to be a part of this group. When it got time to close the evening, the founders stood up and asked for families to pledge their financial support. Matt handed the envelope to me and said, "Give whatever you feel led to give…" In my emotional state, I checked off the most expensive option… To this day I can not recall the amount. Matt seems to think it was $10,000, but that seems way steep to me and the school does not have any record…as I have asked for clarification. When we decided to tackle the debt mountain, I told the school that we could not give the money right away. They were totally understanding and said to just give whatever we felt led to give whenever we felt led to give it.
    The problem is that we have regretted the pledge ever since we made it. That doesn't mean we aren't going to pay it. We will pay it, but it's an expensive price to pay for hastiness. We jumped before discussing and praying. We had no business doing that. Our kids were only in that program for 2 years. We love the founding family, but it isn't a place we would give that kind of money to if we had really thought it through. It haunts me constantly. I think about all the other things we could do with that money, not to mention medical bills that will be coming upon us. I have prayed about it and I know that paying it is what the Lord would have us do. But I could just kick myself. I will never do that again… make decisions without consulting the Lord… Because when we make emotional decisions like that, we are really looking to appease the flesh, not glorify the Lord.

  5. We are in the middle of an international adoption RIGHT NOW, and this was so very encouraging me! I have struggled so much with maintaining a strong faith in His plan, and I am often trying to come up with an "awesome plan" that is going to fund our remaining expenses. I have even been thoroughly annoyed with our church since they aren't financially supporting us at all. You gently, but RIGHTLY, reminded me that this adoption is HIS plan for our family, and HE will "fund what He favors".

    I was really beginning to see the error of my thinking over the last few weeks, and had repented of my attitude. What did God do? He began to supply!! First, we FINALLY got our referral (2 darling sisters, ages 9 and 6!), then He used several friends/family to help us meet our referral fee ($12,000) IN ONE DAY!! He is GOOD, and His plan is always FOR US, and FOR the orphan.

    So thankful for you and for Him! You have been such a mentor to me through your blog. Blessings!

  6. Thank you! Another very powerful post that covers many areas of life. Tonight I feel weighed down by my little girl's issues and just want to run and jump feet first into any ol' plan that "might" help. Your post reminds me that God loves her no-longer-orphaned little self, and He wants for her to be whole even more than I do. I need to ask, fast, thank, wait, and obey. So easy to say, so hard to do, but I will do it. And I will re-read (again!!!!) your posts on hearing God's voice.

  7. Such a sweet reminder that spoke so much to my heart today! Loving this series…. I just keep repeating to myself over and over again that God IS NOT a dead beat Dad. As I am obedient to care for his orphaned children, He will always be faithful to provide for our needs. Today I am clinging to Matthew 21:21.

  8. Linny, it is hard… but also, it is SOOOOO so so sweet to ask… and see God go big and provide. We are that family that couldn't afford it… but he provided for 2 to get home. He uses all kinds of things, but for us He used His Body/People. Not let down at all. Keep sharing about our God who is good and great!

  9. Just wanted you to know that I have enjoyed and been encouraged reading these posts. I have been waiting for more than five years to go back to China…just waiting on God to say "GO", instead of "Hold on, there, missy…it's not time yet." We've been trying to save a good chunk before we started this time, and, while we've saved quite a bit, it hasn't been with the overwhelming success we'd hoped for. BUT I heard Him tell me in church a couple of weeks ago that He doesn't want me to pay for this adoption with money, but with faith. Of course, we have to have the money, but that's not His currency. Still waiting, but I know the time is near…

  10. Just what I needed to hear. I've been praying, and have all these ideas on how to earn extra money, but am waiting to see/hear what God wants…and wouldn't you know…last night we received a cheque for 3 thousand dollars. It wasn't given for the purpose of our adoption, but that is what it will be used for! God is faithful!

  11. Linny, thank you again for your wise counsel. I have learned so much from this blog over the years. Having never fasted before reading your fasting series, God has answered prayers through fasting time and time again for us (our last two adoptions are totally the result of prayer and fasting). We are now in the final stages of bringing home our 7th child-a baby boy from Ethiopia (3rd adoption). God has faithfully provided each time-never as we expected, but always just enough, just in time. As we wait for final clearance form Ethiopia (hopefully in the next few weeks), we are again praying, fasting and waiting for God's provision to provide for our travel expenses. When you have a need and it seems like time is running out, it is so easy to start to worry. THANK YOU for the reminder that we must have faith and earnestly seek the Lord. And yes I do believe he ALWAYS provides.

  12. oh Linny, I feel like God has given you this series to speak directly to me. My husband and I feel the pull of God wanting us to add to our family again through adoption. God has made it clear to me I would be disobeying if I didn't at least take the first steps, and yet we seem stuck by the money issue. We hide behind the "how are we going to do this?" and pace of life we are living. It feels so busy… Thank you for reminding me that we need to ask and wait. Can you please pray we will have the courage to take the first steps this week. Thanks so much. Valerie

  13. Well……we did get money dumped on our doorstep and instead of paying bills, vacations, clothes for the kids, etc we looked at each other knowing exactly what we had to do with it. Because we had joked about going to China just a few months earlier. And God made it very clear that not one but two (thanks to the tax refund) seriously ill children from China would become part of our family. You are 100% on target when you said that if God wants it to happen, it will! Because our adoptions surely would have been impossible on so many fronts without Him. Thank you for the reminder to always ASK and FAST!

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